"The Union"

This is a horrid live recording.
The production on their album "Where you want to be" is so much more powerful. But regardless, Taking Back Sunday is a fantastic band, with strong lyrics and have made excellent use out of the harmony of two singers.
Quite like story of the year, the back up singer seems to do better then the front man, but that does not at all seem evident on their album.

However much i would LOVE to talk about how much i love this band, this is not at all the purpose of this blog entry.
The lyrics in this song, do contribute to the over all entirety of my topic which will be explained after the lyrics have been recited for you:

I wait around for the "Still small center"
From saint to sinner
Well which one is it?
Just who do you think you are?
(Just who do you think you are?)

Well who did you call to get this?
Well is it who I think it is?
I swear to god I'm gonna kill him.

You always knew it was on purpose
Yeah what's the point if it don't serve it's purpose
"Splintered but focused" you're as good as gold
You're built from distractions so brilliantly dull
I had a better friend in my worst of plans
Than I ever had in either one of you.

Well I never made a scene
Well they came to me
I never made a scene (I didn't have to)
Well they came to me
I didn't have to, I didn't have to
Well I never made a scene
I didn't have to, I didn't have to
Well I never made a scene

I always hoped to avoid the issues
Got me alone so I couldn't address you
Home is where you make it, Love,
Don't get yourself confused
Besides what's it to you?
I traded my conscience for your
For your confidence
Attacked my lungs with lies to pass the time
Made states move like regular days

I didn't have to, I didn't have to
Well I never made a scene
I didn't have to, I didn't have to
Well I never made a scene
I didn't have to, I didn't have to
Well I never made a scene
I didn't have to, I didn't have to
Well I never made a scene

I never made a scene
Well they came to me
I never made a scene
Well they came to me

I didn't have to, I didn't have to
Well I never made a scene
I didn't have to, I didn't have to
Well I never made a scene
I didn't have to, I didn't have to
Well I never made a scene
I didn't have to, I didn't have to
Well I never made a scene

The extraordinary amount of power i gather from this song, would have to lie within the abrasive and forward words from the second verse, which i have highlighted in a pretty pink :) and also the chorus, the constant chant "Well i never made a scene / They came to me / I didn't have to." also rounds out my topic rather nicely.

The topic which by now I'm sure your mighty curious about, if you weren't you would have already stopped reading :) is "Family".

Now I'm going to approach this is two different ways:

• Blood related family
  
  AND;

• Chosen family.

Point One:

Now, blood related family cannot be chosen, you have to love what you got, because they are related so. HOWEVER, this does not mean you have to love their personality.
I love my mother BECAUSE she is my mother, and i wish i could lover her as a friend as well, but as it turns out i cannot. She makes life difficult for me, and i have left. In this case, refer to pink highlighted verse from "The Union". This wonderful lyric describes in a metaphorical way (the way i love to address these picky matters that shouldn't be discussed at a distinguished dinner party along with sex, politics and religion) the relationship i have with my mother.

Taking Back Sunday may have had a completely different intention for these particular lyrics in this particular song, but one cannot help how one associates, and regardless of the purpose, they have helped me understand.

The verse:
"I always hoped to avoid the issue" very clear in relation to mother dearest. As i have developed the nifty habit of forgetting painful things and moving on, where as she has not. In knowing this, talking to her is a very delicate process in which i try hard to keep conversations general as possible.
"Got me alone so i couldn't address you" relates back to a few Saturdays ago, when i thought I'd be brave and stay the night without Aurey (the better half) in an effort to reestablish connections and good faith. This however turned to shit, and i was verbally abused and cried at to the point i felt so uncomfortable i left. Mother shall not be talked to, she talks at you.
"Cause home is where you make it, Love" This is true of every situation, for everyone. This is just a universally fantastic line. And very true in regards of my mum. I left the situation, not her. The 'home' i lived in didn't feel like 'home'. That's one reason i left. I'd made Aurey's feel more like home.
"Don't get yourself confused" use of enjambment, continuation of the idea and the line before. Not much to expand upon on this line, though i wish i was addressing mother with this blog entry, i would hope she learned from this. I doubt it though.
"I traded my conscience for your / For your confidence." Very very symbolic of the effort given to making this relationship work. I would sacrifice my sanity for some sort of level of understanding.
"Attacked my lungs with lies to pass the time" as though being upset has truly become an addiction. That in spare time, that should be used to relax, your on the phone to me, abusing me and telling me how much I've hurt you. It does indeed make it hard to breath.
"Made states move like regular days" Now this line is debatable in its reasoning. They could be talking about states literally, as in States of America, or figuratively, as in states of mind and emotion. This is left debatable.

The chorus:
"Well I never made a scene / Well they came to me /I never made a scene (I didn't have to)" to me, translates exactly what family, and in this case, my mother, does. You don't have to do anything, they (mum) is there from the beginning, she "came to me" with this mess, and i didn't have to "make a scene".

Point Two:

Chosen family.
May be choosing a completely different family, friends as closer confidants than family, or choosing a different part of ones own blood family to confide in.
For me, family consists of the Roberts'. The Aunty's and Uncle's and cousins, and those that have married into the Roberts'. And the close friends. The boyfriend and his immediate family. My best friend, pretend little brother who is only that because he is such a close friend and then my old friend that have stuck with me through more then a decade of shit.

I bitch about my life a lot. But i actually am quite happy with it. I have what i need, and needs are better met then wants.

Aurey mother is very intelligent and opinionated women who i have a great deal of respect for.
And in closing to this rather long and personal blog, i will finish by one of the best and one of the most wise quotes i have heard:

"Is it better to live with a lot of possessions and bad company,
or be in good company with little possessions?
Which will ultimately make you happier?"